letmeseeyatigerwalk

NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP YALL

YAY for spring, for great friends, and for summer almost being here!!! 

take me back

i need africa more than africa needs me.

join today.

coffee, coffee, diet coke, more coffee

sometimes i wonder why i'm in school and why i put so much effort in all this school work. but the other day, i was reminded of how God has a reason for everything. i'm going to travel up to NYC, NY this christmas break through a club at my school, to work in a homeless shelter for about a week. it's the opportunities like this and the doors that God opens for you (the ones you didn't even know were there), that make me so very thankful to be here. going on mission trips to places like ethiopia, it's hard for me to remember that there is SO much ministry and work to be done back here at home. and i am overjoyed and humbled to be able to work with people who have become homeless for who knows what reasons. there are so many opportunities to serve while i'm here in college. often times, i find myself feeling so frustrated that i'm stuck in the library for hours on end studying for a test.

thank goodness for days like today, when i realize how silly my complaints are, and how big our God is. for every door that He closes, He faithfully opens another that is so much better for us anyway.

C.S. Lewis is the man

"You don't have a soul. You ARE a soul. You have a body."

i'm so thankful to know that we aren't made for this world. yes, we have a body. but we ARE a soul. so many times i realize that my flesh is getting to me and i'm getting so caught up in all the things that the world is throwing at me. this week, it's been in having an overwhelming amount of school work to do that i can never seem to finish. it can make me feel so discouraged and unprepared. but i have to remind myself, that even though my flesh is telling me i'm exhausted and i really don't want to stay up for the fourth night in a row studying until 4 in the morning, the Lord will give me strength and he will show me that it doesn't matter what my body is telling me, because it's my soul that counts. what i'm working towards now will help me in serving his kingdom once i graduate, wherever that may be.

"If you read history you will find that the Christians who did most for the present world were precisely those who thought most of the next. It is since Christians have largely ceased to think of the other world that they have become so ineffective in this.”

how deep the father's love for us

i'm constantly reminded of how much He loves us. i mess up time and time again and he continues to love me.. i am so undeserving. one of my favorite bible verses is ephesians 2:8 "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith- and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God" it is just humbling to know that its not by what we are doing, because we are all undeserving. but God loves us so much that he gives us a chance to be with him for all eternity anyway.. i just love that about our God.

i've been thinking about all that happened in ethiopia and how i can try to tell all the stories that took place while i was over there. and honestly, there are so many that it's overwhelming. i don't really know where to begin. but i've noticed that God lays one person i've met in ethiopia on my heart for the whole day. i don't know if that makes sense, but for the whole day i'm thinking about that person and praying about them. each person has their own story, and so i'm going to attempt to share each person that is on my heart for that day and hope that it makes sense.

today, it's this sweet lady that i met at the Women at Risk. i'm mad at myself for not being able to pronounce or even try to pronounce the ladies names.. but i'll never forget her. she was one of the women in the program that had previously been a prostitute. she knew small bits and pieces of english but her spirit was so uplifting and positive. i try to think about how i would be if i were in their shoes.. and how i would be after experiencing the terrible things that they've been put through. and i'm not sure i could say i would be as positive and radiant as these women are. she always ALWAYS had a smile on her face.

i get so bogged down in daily life.. i get stressed out easily and school takes over my life. i have to remind myself that if these women who have experienced such hardships can put a smile on their face and remain positive and hopeful, i can do it too. and these women are a constant reminder to me that even if you have so many things in this world telling you that you can't do something, the Lord's plan will prevail. even though at the time they didn't realize how big of an impact they were making, through their actions and attitude, they encourage me everyday to give more, try harder, and love on others constantly because they never, ever give up.

this woman of God probably didn't realize it at the time, but i was taking note of her spirit and joy for the Lord. its humbling to say that even though i wanted to teach her about Christ, she taught me more about Him than i think i could've ever shared, all through her actions. i thought about her all day today, and prayed for her as i did. she is such a precious woman of God and her positive attitude and beautiful smile will never be forgotten.

p.s. ben rector rocks

now that I've seen

A teammate of mine is so talented in filming and photography and she put together a video of our two week trip. to me, i clicked play to watch it, expecting it to be another video of a trip to africa that was full of desperation and sadness.. but what i saw was so completely different. i saw all those little faces that i spent time with. all of those beautiful, happy smiles. and i knew who they were, i immediately recognized them. i saw such JOY and LIFE in that video. i didn't see how sad and deprived these people were. i saw how they were happy, and dancing and singing with joy! i saw what it was like to live for the day and for the Lord and not for money or the things that we have. i saw people who didn't do things to just put on a resume or to get something in return. i saw people who LOVED each other and who did what was right and gave everything that they could.

this post is very hard on my heart for me to write... because i miss them so much. i miss those sweet little faces that i saw in the video. and seeing them moving around and waving at the camera made me feel like i was back in ethiopia again. i want to be back so bad.. i want to make them feel so special and show them how special they are to the Lord. i want to be around people who love the Lord with every last breath they breathe.

i was telling some of my friends how sad i felt being back here. i never thought i would feel SAD to be back in such a comfortable life i live. i don't have to work all day long and serve others all the time here like i did in ethiopia. i get to sleep in a safe house and have running water. i get to live comfortably. going to ethiopia has taught me i don't want to live comfortably again. i want to be serving the Lord and putting myself out there and being an instrument for him. and coming back to a life of comfort and being self serving is frustrating...

i go to sleep and wake up everyday with the faces of all the little kids and streetboys in my memory. i'm so scared for their future but i am trying so hard to trust in the Lord.. it's hard to be here at school when my heart isn't here at all. i'm trying to be passionate about things while i'm here but its hard when the things i care about most are half way across the world. i've watched the video everyday and each time it makes my heart hurt. i miss them so so much. i know God is faithful and i know he will get me through this. he will be the mighty protector and watch over all of the streetboys. it's easier for me to say it than it is to believe it. but i know i've got to trust in him.

i love the quote "now that i've seen, i'm responsible" because i saw so much over on our trip that i never knew existed in the world. such poverty and brokenness. and i know we can help. it's hard to be proactive while you're in college but i also feel like its the best time to get the word out because we are all the same age at the same place. so i pray the Lord will show me a good way to tell everyone about the streetboys. if we are blessed enough to go to school, i'm going to do all that i can to see that they go to school too.

this is the video link, click on it and press play.

http://www.vimeo.com/14286967

the little things

the streetboys have changed my perspective and outlook on life forever. i'll never forget them

Ambo, Ethiopia

these two sweet little kids came to the compassion school everyday but they weren't compassion kids. their mom recently passed away and their dad had no one to watch over them while he tried to find a job... this is the day we gave them new clothes because their old ones were literally falling off of them. i saw the firsthand effect of the generosity from people at home and how it completely improves the kids lives here. 

The market in Ambo

this is sweet adam, who was in my english class. he was the happiest little boy i've ever seen, even if he has almost nothing in his name, it doesn't matter to him. they are trying to show you their prayer wheel we worked on in class 

these little girls are from the orphanage Kechene... they have been orphaned because of the aids/hiv epidemic that has hit ethiopia recently.

the women at risk.

The streets in Addis

These two sweet little girls are the kids of the women at risk.. i know that their lives have been greatly changed by their mothers being put through this program.. they get free schooling and child care while their moms go through counseling and skill training to get a job to earn money for themselves the right way.