Sunday, January 13, 2013

the unknown

I started this blog after my freshman year of college in hopes to put into words my trip to Ethiopia. I didn't know it would turn into months of processing the time I had there and the heartbreak that I felt, as well as all of the clashing emotions of the relief I felt returning home and heartache of leaving. I had no idea that I would keep up with this blog through my sophomore year, where I used it to post different things I coveted and clothes I would love to have. Imagine my surprise when I kept this blog during my junior year to write down sweet moments with the Lord and with my friends in college. Beginning of my junior year, God called me back to Africa. He called me to Kenya for a month. I didn't know what to expect. So I answered that calling, raised money, packed up my things and went. I had no idea what I would be doing during my time there. But He did. 

He called me to learn and grow. To love more. To sacrifice more. To cry more. To have my heart broken more for what breaks His. To use the gifts He has blessed me with more. To glorify His name in all that I can do and in anyway that I possibly could, more. To give more. To laugh more. To trust Him more. To hand over things to Him I hadn't given up yet. And to have greater faith.

And then I came back from Kenya with my heart swelling more than I've ever felt and my mind running a mile a minute. I couldn't imagine what He had in store for my life, but I knew that He had lit something in my heart. Something that I know for certain can never be distinguished. So I used this place to type out my thoughts and process and grow.

So senior year (fall) happened, and I still managed to keep up with the blog. To write about the hearts I missed in Kenya and mine that I left there. And more ramblings about how I don't know the next step in my life and that I'm a senior so I'm supposed have figured this out already sophomore year.  I didn't know that senior year would be full of precious time with friends, taking in the last semester of Auburn, a chapter in my life that was just the greatest in a town that I grew up in. I had no idea that I would be engaged to my best friend and the man that I love and will soon call my husband. But how sweet it was to be able to share such a special time for us two on this space. 

So here I am, finishing my senior year of college, writing in this same blog that I started when I had no idea the journey I was about to embark on. Did I mention I'm going to marry the greatest guy ever? And that we no longer have to do 14 hour long distance?! Now I'm in Austin, 14 hours away from home, taking part in at a great nonprofit with some great new roommates. My prayer is to take each day and soak in as much love and beauty and life that God has granted me to see and enjoy. To laugh a lot, to worry less, and to love more. 

So here goes to another semester, full of unknowns and adventures. I have a peace and a joy for what God has granted me and I have a trust that He will continue to be faithful to my journey this semester. God has been so good and I know He will continue to reveal Himself to me this semester as I intern and prepare for marriage. So as He continues to reveal Himself, I will continue to write. As long as I can continue to find the words and have sweet friends faithfully praying over my adventure.

Sending love out to everyone today!